Is this gril our Anna?

We had a very emotional week since the referral day.

On Tuesday, Aug 25, I "worked" from home so that I could get the match packet earlier. FedEx tracking said it was on delivery vehicle from 8:30am. I eagerly waited the doorbell to ring the entire morning and looked out every few minutes. Finally I saw the FedEx truck in front of my house around 2:30pm. I ran out to grasp my match packet and called Charles to tell him I would soon drive to his office.

I opened the packet and saw more referral photos. She is truly an angle. With a pumping heart I read her medical history wishing that SN information we got over phone were wrong. Unfortunately, it didn't show any difference.

On this important matter, we thought we'd better seek professional reviews before we can decide for what to do the next. Charles scanned the files and emailed to Dr. Jenista in the afternoon. Dr. Jenista called in the evening and advised us to get more information from China side. We emailed the questions regarding the medical history to our agency. Our agency passed the questions to their China Rep.

On Wednesday, no real information from China side since the director of the Orphanage was not in office. I prayed with our fellowship brothers/sisters. Somehow, I found some peace regarding this unexpected. I believe God would lead me in the important decision. If this girl were our Anna, this information from China side would ease all of our concerns.

In Thursday morning, our agency emailed us the responses from China. The answers did explain the belly mass issue in the medical record, but it raised more questions about growth.

We passed new info from China to Dr. Jenista. She replied to us in the afternoon. This little girl most likely was a full term infant with low weight, very poor weight gain and somewhat developmental delay. She has a higher risk to have cp, lower IQ and learning problem. She is too young for any certain diagnoses. In Thursday evening, we emailed our files to Dr. Dana Johnson for a second opinion.

Friday afternoon, Dr. Johnson emailed us his response regarding this little girl. Even though we only pledge to donate $300 which only qualifies us for the response within 3 business days, Dr. Johnson gave us the response within one business day.

Dr. Johnson clearly stated the serious problems this little girl has and may have in the future. Some of SN are well beyond what we could provide as parents; while tons of waiting families are better prepared to adopt a SN girl from China. We are feeling that they are the best candidates to parents for this little girl Jiaguan.

This has been the toughest decision Charles and I ever made. Jianguan seems fit our family so perfect. She is more beautiful than any of our family members. She look like sister to Charles's nephew. I can't keep myself from looking at her photos everyday. It seems her big eyes are querying if I can be her mother. I have cried over and over. Jianguan, I wish you soon would find your parents who provide you all love and needs you deserve!

On the other hand, refuse to accept a referral without good reason is very risky to our dream of building a family in current China adoption program.

A lot of thanks to our friends Jean/Adiran, Jennifer/David who have been with us every moment since the referral day. Jean/Adrian were leaving for a vacation, they could not help thinking of us all time! Thanks for the great support!

Dr. Jenista is so kind. You will soon know her purpose of reviewing the medical history meaning is helping adoptive parents, not for the business. As an adoptive parent herself (She adopted a low birth weight retarded infant. so she is the most qualified person for our case), she gives all support she can to adoption society. She not only refuse to accept the money we think she desired for the time she spent on our case, she also sent us document regarding SN on low birth weight infant.

Dr. Johnson is terrific too. He reviewed our files before we made the donation. He gave the support to adoptive parents regardless if they could pay or not.

Also thanks to brothers/sisters in our church who prayed for us.

Is this girl our Anna? maybe not.

We soon need to make an important decision regarding this beautiful girl CCAA had matched for us. Please keep pray for us. May God with us in each step in our journey to Anna.